I’m fully affirming. How can I support non-affirming churches?

I get this question a lot.

I am fully affirming of LGBTQ+ people and support equal marriage. That’s no secret. I made a video describing my “conversion” on this (it’s soooo 2020 🙄, but still gets at the essence of my thinking on this), and this video has made the rounds in Mennonite Church circles. (I’ve learned not to be surprised when I’m in another province and someone comes up to me and says, “Thank you for that video…”)

However, in my role as executive minister of a regional church denomination, most of the congregations I serve are not affirming, and many of those may never become affirming.

And so, very understandably, people ask the question: “You’re fully affirming. How can you support non-affirming churches?” In a surprising show of unity, it’s a question I get asked by people on both “sides”—for different reasons, of course. So here’s my attempt to describe how I hold these seemingly contradictory things together.

Here’s a strong personal conviction of mine: affirming queer people and supporting equal marriage is a faithful expression of the gospel of Jesus Christ. In fact, I would say it more strongly: I think this is a more faithful expression of the gospel than a non-affirming view. For reasons why I think this, you can check out that dated video (or the accompanying written materials).

However, here’s another strong personal conviction of mine: congregations need to discern together how they are going to faithfully live out the gospel of Jesus Christ in their context. That’s a congregational prerogative and responsibility—and it’s not up to the denomination to determine.

In our polity, congregations come together voluntarily to create regional churches, covenanting together to support each other and do wider ministry together. Yes, we come together around some common values—especially Anabaptist values such as centering on Jesus, nurturing community, and working toward peace—but how these core values get worked out locally is up to each congregation to discern together.

Congregational autonomy and discernment is not just something stated in our denominational constitution which I must follow, though that is true; it is also a strong conviction of mine. It’s not difficult for me to allow congregations to discern differently than I would about how they should live out the gospel in their context; it’s to be expected, since I don’t live in their context.

Let me share another strong personal conviction of mine, however: while I don’t expect congregations to discern in alignment with my own convictions around queer affirmation and inclusion, I do expect congregations to strive to show Jesus’ love for all who are marginalized and mistreated—and this so often includes LGBTQ+ people. Jesus’ way of love is an open-hearted, open-handed, open-armed self-giving for the good of the other, for the good of all—and this includes our queer siblings in Christ and neighbours in the world.

This means that regardless of what a congregation discerns about whether queer folks can become members or Sunday school teachers or pastors, or whether they will marry two people of the same biological sex, I will always exhort our congregations to treat LGBTQ+ people among them and around them with humility, grace, and compassion. I will call on our congregations to speak of queer people with respect and empathy, and to offer as much welcome and inclusion of LGBTQ+ people as their communally discerned “position” allows. (As an aside, a congregation formally adopting an affirming position is no guarantee that they will actually treat queer people any differently. My comments here truly apply to all our congregations.)

I fully realize that, for many queer Christians and allies, this is not enough. They believe affirmation is a direct expression of the gospel, and not simply a matter for congregational discernment. They believe this is a matter of justice, that we must push through the injustice of this inequality and aim for full affirmation and inclusion. I get that, and I often feel the frustration.

But the reality is that I cannot force congregations to become affirming even if I wanted to (see above), and, even if I could, not every congregation would become affirming. And in every one of these congregations, LGBTQ+ Christians would continue to worship and fellowship and serve, remaining in non-affirming churches for a variety of personal reasons. My desire to see these flesh-and-blood siblings in Christ treated with as much compassion and care as possible outweighs my desire for a general justice—especially when there are affirming church options among us for those who need them.

The upshot of all this is that in my role as executive minister in service of the church, I can and do in good conscience support each of our congregations, regardless of their discernment around LGBTQ+ affirmation and inclusion. Regardless of the church, regardless of the need, I come to the congregation with open hands and an open heart, ready to support them as they seek to follow Jesus in their community.

And regardless of the church, regardless of their discerned position on queer affirmation and inclusion, I will always push for us to grow in our Christlike love—open-hearted, open-handed, open-armed, self-giving love—for all those among us and around us, especially those often mistreated and marginalized, including our queer siblings and neighbours.


© Michael W. Pahl

Bad Bible Takes Cause Harm

It’s no secret that I am fully affirming of LGBTQ+ people and equal marriage. It’s also no secret that my position on this is shaped in large part by my reading of the Bible, centred on Jesus and the surprising work of the Spirit.

However, it’s not enough for me to say, “Here’s what I think is a better way of reading the Bible related to sexuality, gender, and marriage.” It’s also important to put the spotlight on some really bad takes on a few biblical passages, not to win a debate, but because these bad takes have caused—and continue to cause—tremendous harm to LGBTQ+ folks.

Here are four of those Bad Bible Takes that cause real-life harm.

Bad Bible Take #1: Sodom and Gomorrah were judged by God because of homosexuality.

I get it. On the surface it sure looks like that’s what’s going on in Genesis 19, since you’ve got “the men of Sodom” wanting to have sex with the visiting angels, described as “men.”

But it’s hard to imagine that all “the men of the city” of Sodom, “all the people to the last man,” were gay. And more importantly, the sex being described is not based on sexual attraction; it is violent rape, which is always about power and control more than it is about sex. (Prepare your innocent eyes here: the rape of not just women, but also men, by heterosexual male soldiers has not been an uncommon feature of warfare through human history.)

The true sin of Sodom in this story is that, not only did the Sodomites refuse to extend hospitality to the strangers in their midst (like that modeled by Abraham in the previous chapter), they responded to these strangers with violence, wanting to brutalize them and cast them out. One wonders if this was the way Sodom treated all those who were vulnerable and needy.

Which is exactly where Ezekiel 16:49-50 goes with the Sodom story: “This was the guilt of your sister Sodom: she and her daughters had pride, excess of food, and prosperous ease but did not aid the poor and needy. They were haughty and did abominable things before me; therefore I removed them when I saw it.”

“Ah,” you might say, “but Jude says Sodom’s sin was homosexuality!” And you’d be wrong.

Jude 7 says, “Sodom and Gomorrah and the surrounding cities, which, in the same manner as they, indulged in sexual immorality and pursued unnatural lust, serve as an example by undergoing a punishment of eternal fire.” The phrase “unnatural lust” is literally “lusting after different flesh,” and seems to be a reference to the men lusting after angels. (Think about it: it would be weird to describe same-sex lust as lusting after “different flesh”!).

But what about the “abominable things” that Ezekiel mentions? Could that be a reference to homosexuality? Well, it’s possible that they refer to the same thing being referenced in Leviticus 18:22 and 20:13, which speak of a man “lying with a male as with a woman,” describing this as an “abomination” (same word in Hebrew). However, if that’s so, this actually helps us interpret Leviticus 18:22 and 20:13, not the other way around—which leads to the next Bad Bible Take.

Bad Bible Take #2: The Law of Moses condemns homosexuality.

Again, I get it. “You shall not lie with a male as with a woman; it is an abomination,” seems pretty straightforward. But there are a few things wrong with seeing this as a blanket condemnation of “homosexuality.”

First, these verses in Leviticus say nothing about female-female sex, only some form of male-male sex. And second, these verses say nothing about same-sex attraction, let alone sexual orientation. In other words, right off the bat these verses are not condemning everything that is meant today by “homosexuality”: a sexual orientation that involves same-sex attraction, either female-female or male-male, and which may or may not be expressed through same-sex sexual acts.

Third, the phrase “as with a woman” suggests that penetration is the specific sexual act being described. Not sexual orientation, not female-female sex acts, and not even all male-male sex acts: just male-male penetration. If this is the focus, this prohibition is probably alluding to patriarchal notions of sexual penetration being inherently a male act: men penetrate, women are penetrated. Considering Jesus upset many patriarchal notions in his dayincluding anticipating a time, already here, when men would no longer “marry” and women no longer “be given in marriage”this would be an odd thing for Christians to double down on.

However, fourth, some scholars have suggested that the reference here is specifically to male-male sex as part of the idolatrous practices of Israel’s neighbours, and perhaps even to prostitution or pederasty within that idolatrous context. And here’s where the reference to Sodom in Ezekiel 16 can actually help understand what’s going on in Leviticus 18 and 20. Because Ezekiel 16 says a lot about sexual immorality and “abominations” in its comparison of Israel with Sodom—and it’s all about prostitution in the context of idolatry.

In other words, at the very least Leviticus 18 and 20 aren’t speaking to things like sexual orientation or even female-female sex. But it’s very likely these verses are not even speaking about all male-male sex either—only male-male sex that is idolatrous or exploitative in nature. Which leads to the next Bad Bible Take.

Bad Bible Take #3: Paul lists homosexuality among those sins that are contrary to sound teaching and keep one from the kingdom of God.

I’m speaking, of course, of the two “vice lists” in 1 Corinthians 6:9-10 and 1 Timothy 1:9-11. Some English translations use the word “homosexual” in these lists of sins. But that’s a really bad—and harmful—translation of the word arsenokoitai. (It’s worth noting that no English translation before 1946 translated arsenokoitai as “homosexuals.”)

Arsenokoitai comes from two Greek words, meaning “man” and “lie with.” If that rings a bell, it should—it’s the language of Leviticus 18:22 and 20:13. In other words, whatever is being referenced as sexual immorality in these Leviticus verses is likely what’s being described as sexual immorality in 1 Corinthians 6 and 1 Timothy 1.

And, as we’ve seen, that’s not “homosexuality” as some blanket term. It’s not about sexual orientation. It’s not about female-female sex. And it’s probably not even about all male-male sex, but particular male-male sex acts that are idolatrous or exploitative in nature. Which makes perfect sense in the context of these vice lists in 1 Corinthians  and 1 Timothy: “idolaters” and “slave traders” are listed right alongside arsenokoitai.

And this is a good segue to the fourth Bad Bible Take.

Bad Bible Take #4: Paul describes homosexuality as a sin which God gives people over to in judgment.

Yes, I’m now talking about Romans 1:26-27.

First, once again, this passage is only clearly speaking of male-male sex. Some translations have verse 26 describing women exchanging natural relations with unnatural relations “with other women”—but that last phrase is not there in Greek. The “unnatural relations” that women engage in are more likely “unnatural relations” with men, or, even more likely, with animals (Leviticus 20 once again may be in the background here, and bestiality is the one sin listed there which women are said to instigate).

Second, the male-male sex that is described has nothing to do with the sex that happens within a committed, loving relationship. It’s a sex motivated by lust and grounded in idolatry. In other words, like Leviticus 18 and 20, like 1 Corinthians 6 and 1 Timothy 1, Paul in Romans 1 seems to be thinking of male-male sex acts that are idolatrous and exploitative.

None of these passages—not a one—is referring to “homosexuality” in general as we understand it today, let alone what we know of as same-sex marriage. These are all condemning harmful same-sex acts, in exactly the same way that the Bible condemns harmful heterosexual acts.

These are just Bad Bible Takes.

But the worst part about all these Bad Bible Takes is not their exegesis, but the harm they have caused.

Some of these Bad Bible Takes are more clearly wrong interpretations or translations than others, especially Takes #1 and #3. But the reality is that at least some biblical scholars who oppose same-sex marriage don’t look to these passages anymore to support their view. They know these passages are not as clear as they’ve been made out to be, and they may not even speak about “homosexuality” as we think of it today.

But even worse than the biblical interpretation behind these Bad Bible Takes is the fact that these have been used as “clobber passages,” heavy clubs to pound gay people into submission, shame, and silence. Even if non-affirming scholars don’t look to these passages anymore, they are still used every day on social media, in coffee shops, around kitchen tables—and in churches.

The result has been devastating—not just for gay, lesbian, and bisexual folks, who one might expect to receive the brunt of these particular “clobber passages,” but for people of all the letters and the plus of “LGBTQ+.” Queer youth generally have a higher risk of depression, suicide, homelessness, and being a victim of a violent crime than the average. But the risk of these things is even greater when their family rejects them, and even greater again when their community of faith rejects them. (For instance, see here.)

And part of that rejection is taking these Bad Bible Takes and wielding them like a club, and in doing so destroying these beloved children of God, bearers of the image of God.

May we leave these Bad Bible Takes behind and instead reach out to LGBTQ+ folks around us and among us with love, with tenderness, with compassion—and with full acceptance, even celebration, for who they are.


As I’ve indicated in this post, many non-affirming biblical scholars and theologians don’t primarily base their view on these passages. They appeal to a broader biblical theology of gender, sexuality, and marriage, claiming that the Bible supports a binary view of sex and gender and/or a “traditional view” of marriage as only heterosexual. I don’t find their arguments compelling, but it’s important to note that I’m not addressing those “better” arguments for a non-affirming view here. See “My Journey toward Being Affirming” for a broader biblical-theological argument for an affirming perspective.

© Michael W. Pahl

My Journey Toward Being Affirming

I have been fully affirming of LGBTQ+ folks and supportive of equal marriage for several years now. This was the culmination of many years of research and reflection and, most importantly, relationship with LGBTQ+ people. Although my story of becoming affirming is not the most important story to be heard in this, my story might be helpful to others. Here it is.

Note that my views do not necessarily reflect those of my current or previous employers. Note also that this can seem a little dated in some ways (the use of “folx” hasn’t caught on widely, for example!).

Some handouts related to this video:

© Michael W. Pahl